John Kador, freelance writer

1997
Passover in Hollywood:
A Passover Haggadah

By John Kador

Welcome

Candle-Lighting

ALL: Baruch ata adonai, eh-lo-hay-noo mel-lech ha-alom, asher kid-sha-anoo be-mittzvo-tav, ve-tzee-va-noo le-had- leek nayr shel Yom tov.
Blessed are You, our God, Giver of Light, who sanctifiedus with mitzvot and commanded us to kindle the holiday lights.

Kiddush: The First Cup of Wine

ALL: Baruch ata adonai, eh-lo-hay- noo mel-lech ha-alom, bo-ray pree hagafen
Blessed are Thou, Lord our God, Ruler of the Universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine.

ALL: Baruch ata adonai, eh-lo-hay-noo mel-lech ha-alom, sheh-he-chech-ya-noo ve-kee-ye-ma-noo ve-hee-gee-a-noo la-z’man ha-zeh.
Blessed are Thou, Lord our God, Ruler of the Universe, who has kept us alive and who has sustained us so that we may reach this day.

The Story Begins

TIME: Today

PLACE: A Hollywood sound stage

(assign parts in this section to reading children)

Boys and girls, I’m not kidding, we’re in big trouble. This movie’s in deep doo doo and if we don’t get back on schedule, it’s gonna be my keister.

Looks like you’ve got plenty to spare.

Very funny. When did they start letting you out of your coffin during daylight?

Okay, that’s enough. The new director’s gonna be out on the set and you know how nasty he is?

How nasty is he?

Well, he can’t go on the beach because cats cover him with sand.

CHILDREN: That’s pretty nasty!

This movie’s more of a dog.

Whose idea was it? What kind of a movie is "How Green Was My Fungus"?

No wonder they fired the director.

Everyone quiet down. Here comes the new director.

Your attention, please, ladies and gentlemen. I have a number of important announcements to make.

Did they finally invent Smell-O-Rama?

Take that guy out of here.

Ladies and gentlemen, for those of you who don’t know me, I am Cauldicott B. Carlyle The Third. My friends call me Skippy. You can call me Mister Caludicott B. Carlyle the Third. I run a tight ship.

How tight is it?

It’s so tight that if you put another notch in the belt . . .

That’s pretty tight.

Listen up, ladies and gentlemen, there’s been a change in plans. "How Green Was My Fungus" is out. The brains at the studio want us to switch gears.

We’re gonna make a new movie?

That’s right. Passover, whatever that is is coming up, and the studio wants us to make "The Passover Story."

"The Passover Story"? I can see the pitch meeting now.

[A studio office]

The Passover Story, huh? What’s it about?

Have you ever seen The Ten Commandments?

No.

Well, it’s just like that.

Passover. OK, give it to me in high concept.

High concept?

Yeah, you know, tell me the story in one sentence.

Sure, J.B. It’s simple: Terminator meets Mad Max, breaks his gang out of the joint, offs the bad guys, and lives happily after in the land of milk and honey.

It can’t miss, J.B.

Tell me about the characters.

Well, the lead is Moses. I’ve talked to Arnold and Bruce and they’re gonna fight it out.

So what’s the story?

Check this out. The Jews are like slaves in Egypt.

Oh, I get it. It’s a prison movie. They bust out of the joint cause the screws are beating on them.

No, no. This happens a long time ago.

Before there were cellular phones?

Before then.

You’ve heard of the Pyramids?

Like in Las Vegas?

Bingo. You’re a scholar. Well you remember how trapped everyone feels when Wayne Newton hits those high notes? Well that’s how the Jews felt in Egypt. They wanted to get out but . . .

There’s a bad guy, right?

That’s right. His name is Pharaoh.

What kind of a name is Pharaoh?

It’s Egyptian.

It’s not a very good name for a villian. Can we change it to Butch or Snake or something?

Sure, chief, Whatever you want.

Okay, well go for it. But if you go a buck over budget, I’ll have your matzo balls.

[Back to the set]

Okay, can we have the scripts?

What scripts?

You know, with our lines.

You don’t need a script. I’m going to improvise this movie. No one will be able to tell the difference.

Let’s set up the first scene.

Let’s set up for the scene in Pharaoh’s court.

Places, everybody.

Pharaoh’s Court. Take One.

Lights!

Camera!

Action!

To be, or not to be. That is the question.

Cut!

Sorry. Wrong play.

Pharaoh’s Court. Take Two.

[As an upset minister]: Great, Pharaoh, it is written that an upstart Hebrew leader will emerge and lead the children of Israel into freedom.

My horse, my horse, my kingdom for a horse!

Cut.

Pharaoh’s Court. Take Three.

[As an upset minister]: Great, Pharaoh, it is written that an upstart Hebrew leader will emerge and lead the children of Israel into freedom.

It’s not gonna happen. Not on my watch. Hey, Sal, help me out here. What are my options?

I think there’s just one thing you can do. Take every Hebrew boy and throw them into the Nile.

How we gonna do that?

Just throw them off the pier.

How we gonna get them out to the pier?

We’ll use peer pressure.

Cut. That’s a take. Call the next scene.

[In the Jewish quarter where Yocheved and Amram come up with a desperate plan to keep their newborn little boy alive.]

The Jewish Quarter. Take one.

Some people are born to greatness.

Others have greatness thrust upon them.

Some become Hollywood executives

need line

Cut. Let’s can the editorialzing.

The Jewish Quarter. Take Two.

[as Yochaved] Moses, you are destined for greatness.

[as Amram] You will survive this terrible ordeal because we are going to put you in a basket and float you downstream.

[as Yochaved] God will look after you.

That’s a take. Call the next scene.

Down river

[Scene shifts down river, where the Pharaoh’s sister and her maids are bathing]

[Surprised]: What do we have here?

Look, princess, a baby!

This must be a sign. This boy will be as my own child. Let no one speak of this moment. Moses, you are now Egypt’s.

Cut! Beautiful! We’re on a roll. Next scene

[18 years later, in Pharaoh’s Court. Moses has grown into a Prince of Egypt.]

[In the court, 18 years later]

[Pharaoh] How potent cheap music is.

Cut

Take two

Are you happy, Moses?

Well, I’m happy, Great Pharaoh, but I’m not content. The outward manifestation of my contentedness is sublimated by the exigent condition of my inward compass.

What?

Forgive, Moses, Great One. He’s taking Psych 101 in college.

He must be getting a great education. I didn’t understand a word he said.

Great One, only yesterday it seems that I came to court. Since then, you have put me before your own son. Great Pharaoh, I love thee as I love Egypt. Yet I fear my place is elsewhere.

Moses, can you put words to what is in your heart?

know it’s strange, but I feel my place is out there somewhere.

That’s silly, but there is no there there.

In the wilderness

Are we there yet?

No, we are still here.

[A short while later]

ADULT : What’s Moses doing?

ADULT 2: All day long, he wanders among the Jews in the mud pits.

ADULT 3 What is he looking for?

ADULT : Who is that Egyptian and why does he look at me so strangely?

ADULT : Why does he look familiar?

ADULT : [Excited, announcing a newspaper]: Extra! Extra! Read all about it! Moses slays Overseer!

ADULT [In a newscaster’s voice]: In a startling development, Moses, the nephew of the Pharaoh, killed an Egyptian overseer in the mudpits today, further adding to the shaky relationship between Egyptians and their Hebrew slaves. Film at Eleven.

ADULT : This is ______ at the mudpits. Six hours after the bizarre incident in which Moses killed the overseer, the facts of the situation are just starting to emerge. I have with me an eyewitness to the attack.

ADULT: It was like this overseer was beating this slave, see? No big deal, right? All of a sudden, this guy I never saw before jumps into the pit and kills the overseer.

ADULT Reaction to the incident at the Court was immediate. For more on this, we go to ADULT endel at the Palace. _______, what’s the mood there now?

ADULT _______, the mood at the Palace is tense. The Pharaoh is in seclusion. A statement was issued earlier that called for calm and order.

ADULT 3 [as palace spokesperson, reading] "The Pharaoh has full confidence in Moses. No doubt when all the circumstances are known, this regrettable situation can be put into appropriate context. In the meantime, it is asked that Moses turn himself in."

ADULT Stick around? Shtick around! Mine face is on "Egypt’s Ten Most Wanted." Everybody wants a piece of the reward. What you thinking for I want to stick around Egypt. Mama put me in the Nile to go down, not up, the river!

CHILD Flash, Moses applies for political asylum in Midian.

[Scene shifts to Midian]

ADULT: [as Jethro]: You are welcome here, Moses. Are you not safe in my tent? Have I not given you my first daughter Zipporah? Are you not content in Midian?

ADULT I am indebted to you, Jethro. I tend your flocks and I raise my family. Surely no man could be more content. Yet I am a stranger in a strange land.

ADULT 2: [as Zipporah]: Your work in Egypt is not finished, my husband. Your calling will be soon revealed.

[While looking for a lost lamb, Moses encounters a burning bush]

ADULT [with great authority] : I have come to you in a burning bush. Struggle no more against your destiny. Moses, phone home! The children of Israel need you. Embrace your people and lead them from the days of fear.

ADULT Listen, next time you want to send a message, try Western Union! Invest in someone else. I’m not worthy! I am filled with doubt. Anyway, a burning bush is pretty low tech, already!

ADULT: Low tech? Check out the graphics. Interactive multimedia with hot links to other miracles. Notice how the bush burns but is unconsumed?

ADULT : [Whispers, like a TV golf announcer]: This is a sign that

although the Jewish people might be consumed in flames, it would continue to live and resist, like the thorns in the bush.

ADULT All right, already! Zipporah, pack my bags! Don’t forget the sandals with the prescription arches and the talcum. The desert is murder for chaffing.

[Back to Egypt]

CHILD: Flash, Moses returns to Egypt.

ADULT: Jews strike against Pharaoh.

ADULT: Pharaoh Denies Straw to Slaves.

ADULT: Who cares about straw?

CHILD: Nudnik! We use straw to make bricks.

ADULT: The thing is, now we have to make just as many bricks without straw.

CHILD: If we don’t, we are whipped.

ADULT [newscaster voice, sound of whipping]: This is the sound of Jews

being whipped today in the mudpits. Good evening. In the wake of the failed strike led by Moses, Pharaoh clamps down on the Jews.

ADULT: [As angry slave]: Fellow Jews, it’s all Moses’ fault. If it wasn’t for Moses, you would have all the straw you need and your backs would not be bleeding.

ADULT Good evening. The Jews continue their internal power struggle, with many Jews blaming Moses and each other for their difficulties. Pharaoh’s strategy for turning Jew against Jew seems to be working.

ADULT : [as Egyptian commentator]: Divide and conquer is an age-old tactic of all tyrants. But it's still one of the most effective tools. If you can get the oppressed people to fight each other over the crumbs, they will never form alliances to challenge the oppressors.

ADULT 4: [Angrily]: It’s all your fault, Moses. You should have stayed in Midian.

ADULT: Go back, Moses! We don’t need you.

ADULT: We don’t trust you.

LEAH: Get a life!

CHILD: Don’t make waves. We’ll lose what little we have!

ADULT: At last a righteous Jew stood up.

ADULT 2: Quit your kvetching. Have we so forgotten the taste of freedom, that we are content to fight for the crumbs of bondage?

CHILD: What are we fighting to preserve?

ADULT : A life of slavery in the mudpits?

ADULT: Let Moses go to Pharaoh and speak the justice of our cause.

[back in the Egyptian court]

ADULT: [as Pharaoh]: That who's? You it's so. Down go, Moses. Words your on back my turn I.

ADULT [wearily]: You can turn your back on me, but my words are from Adonai. I am an old man, only a vessel for the right and mighty. The Lord speaks through me. If you don’t let the children of Israel go, the Lord will visit ten plagues upon the people of Egypt, each more terrible than the last.

ADULT: Stones and sticks. Me hurt never will words your but bones my break may stones and sticks.

ADULT [Ted Koppel voice]: This is Egypt Held Hostage: Day Ten. Good Evening. This is Nightline and I’m ADULT 4Krevitt reporting from Washington. For the past ten days, the world has watched Egypt deal with one plague after another. For more on this story, here is Nightline Middle East correspondent, _____, on the scene in Alexandria. _______(name of next speaker)?

ADULT: ______ , for the past nine days, just as Hebrew leader Moses warned, Egyptians have suffered plague after plague. But those nine plagues combined do not begin to describe the horror of last night. The tenth plague must surely make Pharaoh give up the slaves.

ADULT Nightline correspondent ADULT 2 Golger is in Cairo for a look at how the plagues have impacted a typical Egyptian family. [Name of snext speaker] ?

ADULT 2: ______ life will never be the same for the Mubarek family, Abdul and Emiralda, and their eight-year-old daughter, Jasmine. They are in grief and shock at the sudden death of their son, Anwar. After all the pain, Emiralda, a training supervisor in the mudpits, is ready to see the Hebrew slaves go.

ADULT: [as Emiralda, typical Egyptian mother]: We beg of you, Pharaoh, Egyptian mothers tremble for our nation that the Hebrew God is just. Let the slaves go.

ADULT 2: [still in newscaster mode]: Professor Salman Mohammed, Professor of Egyptian Studies at Cairo University, has a theory about the plagues:

ADULT : [as the professor, with academic condescension]: It is a little known but indisputable fact that the God of the Hebrew’s regrets all suffering, even that of oppressor’s. For that reason, generations hence who tell of the suffering of the people of Egypt spill a drop of wine--symbolizing the blood of the Egyptians--when each plague is mentioned.

[As each plague is read, we dip a finger into our wine or juice glasses and transfer a drop to our plates]

CHILD: On the first day. . . .

ADULT : Water turned to blood.

CHILD: On the second day. . . .

ADULT: Everywhere we looked: frogs!

CHILD: On the third day. . . .

CHILD: We couldn’t open our mouths without gnats flying in.

CHILD: On the fourth day . . . .

ADULT: If we opened our mouths to let the gnats out, flies flew in.

CHILD: On the fifth day. . . .

ADULT: Well, the fifth day left every in udder shock. All our cows died.

CHILD: On the sixth day. . . .

ADULT: Every one broke out in horrible boils.

CHILD: On the seventh day. . . .

CHILD: Hail destroyed our crops.

CHILD: On the eighth day. . . .

CHILD: Locusts came by the millions to eat everything that wasn’t covered up.

CHILD: On the ninth day. . . .

ADULT: The light deserted us and we were put into darkness.

ADULT : But even after nine plagues, each worse than the last, did Pharaoh let the slaves go?

EVERYONE: [together] No!

ADULT: as spokesman for Pharaoh]: His grandfather, the Pharaoh, had slaves. His father, the Pharaoh, had slaves. This Pharaoh will not be the first Pharaoh who abandons Egypt's sacred traditions. The Pharaoh considers these trials as a test of our resolve. This morning he was in good spirits and he said, "We survived all the plagues. What more can happen?"

CHILD: On the tenth day. . . .

ADULT: [As reporter]: Well, Jim, all Egypt now knows the answer to Pharaoh’s question. In the darkest night of Egypt’s history, on the tenth day, the oldest male child of each family in Egypt died.

ADULT , we’re getting preliminary reports that only Egyptian

children died. The children of Jews seem to be unhurt. What do we know about this?

ADULT: Jim, we know that Moses told all the Hebrews to take

lamb’s blood and make a mark on their front doors. It’s as if the angel of death that took the first born of each household passed over the houses marked with blood.

ADULT [as Angel-in-training Virgil]: Hey, that’s what you mean by

"Passover."

ADULT Bingo. But the story’s not over yet, thanks be to God.

ADULT 2: [as a member of the jury, taking advantage of this interruption]: "Thanks be to God"? Moses, Jews, I believe, are people chosen by God. How can you thank a God who has chosen Jews to be victims?

ADULT Even if our lot has often been that of victims, we thank God for helping us not to be like our oppressors.

[we return to our story]

ADULT: [as Pharaoh, grieving]: We have endured the unendurable. Our sons are dead! How much more can Egypt take? Let the children of Israel go!

ADULT [as newscaster]: We are interrupting our regular programming to

bring you a special bulletin. The Pharaoh has just decreed that all Hebrew slaves are free and must leave Egypt. If you are a Hebrew, you must leave immediately. You must bake your bread right now. You do not, repeat do not, have time to let your bread rise.

ADULT [as Angel-in-training Virgil] : What do you mean they couldn’t let the bread rise?

ADULT [losing patience]: Hey, you interrupt the story one more time and I’ll make matzo meal out of you. The Jews had to am-scray! They were busier than a one legged man in a butt kicking contest. They didn’t have time for the dough to rise so whenever Jews recreate Passover, we eat only matzo, never bread.

ADULT : [TV announcer voice] We’ll return to "The Passover Story" after a word from our sponsor.

ADULT 3 [Voice from drive-through loudspeaker]: Welcome to Matzo King. Can I take your order?

ADULT: Uh, yeah. Gimme a matzo burger, hold the horseradish, large fries, and a medium Shav.

ADULT 3 You want some Karpas on that?

ADULT: Yeah, sure, and give me an order of mannah nuggets.

ADULT 3 We’re having a special today. Order our deep dish Maror, and you get our haroset sampler. Anything else?

CHILD: Mom, can I get a Matzo Meal? I need the burning bush figure for my collection.

ADULT : [Announcer voice, fast]: Come to Matzo King and try our seder special. Free copy of the Jerusalem Post with each order. Open for Pesach, both nights.

[back to the story]

ADULT : Okay, Jews, listen up. We’re at the Red Sea, the border of Egypt. Over there is the Promised Land. Now, how we going to get across?

ADULT: We’d better think fast. Here comes the Egyptian army. Looks like three days of making your own bricks is enough equality.

EVERYONE: [great confusion] Moses, what are we going to do? We’re trapped. We can’t go any farther.

ADULT [Raises his arms] I raised my arms to get some quiet so I could think. [Pause] Then all of a sudden, something happened. [Takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly] I felt the Lord’s power working through me.

ADULT: Look, everyone. The Red Sea is parting. Moses did it!

CHILD: Now we can run.

ADULT 2: Flash. The entire Egyptian army was destroyed this afternoon when it attempted to follow the fleeing slaves of Egypt through the parted waters of the Red Sea.

ADULT Preliminary reports indicate that when the army got to the deepest part of the Red Sea, the parted waters came together, drowning the Egyptian army.

ADULT: Look at all those guys drowning.

CHILD Yeah. You'd think that in the event of a water landing, they could use their seat cushions as flotation devices.

ADULT: Those poor guys. They all had mothers. How could God do that?

ADULT: Well, they were going to kill us, or worse.

CHILD: Or worse? What could be worse?

CHILD: They could make us return to slavery.

ADULT: Can we ever forgive the Egyptians?

ADULT: I think we can forgive the our enemies for killing our children.

ADULT : It's a little harder to forgive our enemies for making our children kill theirs.

[the story is winding down]

ADULT : There is nothing now between us and freedom.

ADULT : We wandered around the desert for 40 years.

ADULT God gave us mannah to eat every day.

ADULT: What did mannah taste like?

ADULT: No one knows. The only thing the Torah says about mannah is that it tasted like whatever you wanted it to taste like.

CHILD: Was it animal, vegetable, or mineral?

PHIL [as old timer]: It's a long time ago, but to me it tasted approximately like chicken McNuggets.

CHILD The Lord gave us the Ten Commandments.

CHILD: Eventually the Jews got to the Promised Land and established a nation of freedom.

ADULT [Pleased with himself]: And that’s the story of Passover!

ADULT [As Angel-in-training Virgil, unimpressed]: Nice. We’ll get back to you. By the way, how was the Promised Land? Lots of milk and honey?

ADULT I don’t know. I never made it that far.

ADULT: No? Why not?

ADULT The Shekhinah considered me a shlepper. I wasn’t worthy to enter the Promised Land. I had too much doubt in my heart.

ADULT: [testing]: If you weren’t good enough for the promised land, what makes you think you’re good enough to enter Heaven?

ADULT I am already in Heaven. Heaven is right here. Right now. It is to my right. It is to my left. Heaven fills the spaces created by the babies, CHILD and Sabrina, and the grandparents, renewed by the miracle of life created out of life. And that, my friends, brings us to a place in the story where we can soon have some munchies.

ADULT 3 Moses, the jury thanks you. Now, just a few more questions. You believe Passover is the greatest achievement of your life?

ADULT With all my soul. And I’m honored that every year at this time, when the world awakens from Winter, Jews from all over the world hold a seder to remember Passover.

ADULT: Nor are we content merely to retell the story.

ADULT: We relive it, as if each one of us are slaves.

ADULT 4: As if each one of us made the Passover journey personally.

ADULT : We make the journey together.

CHILD: We make it with music.

ADULT : How?

CHILD: How? I'll show you. Bring me a lyre.

ADULT : [fast and desperate]: The dog ate my homework. The check's in the mail. I'm from the government and I'm here to help you. No, it's not fattening. Of course I'm over 18. What library book?

ADULT : Not that kind of lyre! We need to get the young people involved.

CHILD: How?

ADULT: By having the children ask the four important questions.

ADULT: Such as?

CHILD: Why is this night different from all other nights?

CHILD Why is it that on all other nights we eat bread, but on this night we eat only matzo?

ADULT: Why is it that on all other nights we eat all kinds of vegetables, but on this night we must eat bitter herbs?

ADULT: Why is it that on all other nights we might not dip one food into another even once, but on this night we dip different foods twice?

ADULT: Why is it that on all other nights we may sit or recline, but on this night we all eat in a reclining position?

ADULT Those are good questions. Let's check out Encarta.

ADULT: Wait! Maybe someone here knows the answers to these questions? [children are given a chance to answer the four questions]

ADULT 3 Another way we make the journey together is by preparing and eating special foods that remind us of the Passover story.

ADULT: See the seder plate? It has five foods on it--a roasted bone, an egg, and bitter herbs in the form of parsley and horseradish.

ADULT: There is also a mixture of chopped nuts, apples, and wine called haroset.

ADULT 2: The roasted bone reminds us of the lamb that we thankfully ate at the Temple in Jerusalem.

ADULT 4: The bitter herbs remind us how bitter it was to live the life of a slave.

ADULT: The haroset looks like the clay out of which we toiled to make the bricks for Pharaoh.

ADULT : The egg and the parsley remind us of the new life that comes each Spring.

ADULT: By eating the greens that come to life each Spring, we celebrate a season of rebirth and renewal, where all things are possible.

ADULT : The salt water reminds us of the tears our people shed when we were slaves in Egypt.

(Everyone dips some greens and eggs in salt water and says)

ALL: Blessed art Thou, Lord our God,
Ruler of the Universe,
Creator of the fruits of Spring.

ADULT: On the seder table, there is a plate with three pieces of matzo. One piece is called the afikoman, which we will hide.

ADULT 4: This is an important piece of matzo. We cannot finish the seder without it. So later, the children will hunt for it and the child who finds it will get a surprise.

ADULT : Let us taste the haste of our ancestors. [Takes a piece of matzo, breaks off some and passes the rest along. We eat]

[Pour a second cup of wine or juice]

ALL: Baruch ata adonai, eh-lo-hay- noo mel-lech ha-alom, bo-ray pree hagafen.
Blessed are Thou, Lord our God, Ruler of the Universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine.

ADULT 2: So that the bitterness of slavery is never forgotten, we taste the horseradish and matzo. This is called maror. [The bottom matzo is broken and distributed.]

ALL: Baruch ata adonai, eh-lo-hay-noo mel-lech ha-alom, asher kid-sha-noo be-mitzvo-tav, ve-tzee-va-noo al achee-lat maror.
Blessed are You, our God, Creator of the Universe, who sanctified us with the Torah and commanded us to eat the bitter herb.

ADULT: To remember the destruction of the temple of Jerusalem, we break the bottom matzo, and put maror and haroset between the two pieces.

ADULT: This sandwich we eat in memory of our sage, Hillel, who ate matzo and maror together. In time of freedom, we must never forget the bitterness of slavery.

ADULT: In time of slavery we must keep alive the hope of freedom.

CHILD Legend has it that in days of old, kings and queens drank no less that three cups of wine or juice at meals.

CHILD: But tonight we are so happy that we drink four cups.

[third cup of wine]

ALL: Baruch ata adonai, eh-lo-hay-noo mel-lech ha-alom, bo-ray pree hagafen.

Blessed are Thou, Lord our God, Ruler of the Universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine.

The Meal is Served

The Afikoman

(After the meal, the young people hunt for the afikoman. The winner receives a gift to redeem the afikoman. Pieces of this, the sweetest piece, can now be passed around.)

Elijah's Cup

[The door is opened and the extra cup is filled]

ADULT: There is a story that Elijah, a great teacher who lived many years ago, visits every Seder to wish us a year of peace and freedom.

ADULT: We open the door and invite Elijah to come in and join us.

CHILD Watch his cup to see if he enjoys any of the wine.

CHILD: The door is open to welcome Elijah

ADULT: It is a sign of our determination to fulfill his hope of a world where there is freedom for all.

[Back to the meeting room in Heaven. Will Moses get into Heaven?]

ADULT: Moses, the jury will now vote on your petition to enter Heaven. How says the jury, Aye or Nay?

[one by one, everybody, starting with ADULT and going clockwise, votes "Aye" or "Nay", adding, if they wish, a brief statement about why they respect or admire Moses.]

ADULT: Your merit is obvious, Moses, but one thing above all made our decision easy.

ADULT [as Moses] So tell me, already. I’m not getting younger.

ADULT: You're in because the name Moses appears not even once in the traditional telling of the Passover story.

CHILD: This can mean only one thing.

CHILD That Moses had a terrible publicist?

CHILD: No. It means that the important thing about Passover is not the worship of a man, but the celebration of God saving our people.

ADULT: By what right, then, Moses, do you claim any achievement in Passover?

ADULT By the same right and in the same magnitude that each of us at this table claims. We claim that right every year by acting out the story, as our ancestors did at this season, so that we might be free.

Blessing Over the Fourth Cup

ALL: Baruch ata adonai, eh-lo-hay-noo mel-lech ha-alom, bo-ray pree hagafen.
Blessed are Thou, Lord our God, Ruler of the Universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine.

Di E-nu, Di E-nu

ADULT: We are indeed blessed. We remember this with a song that asks, "What is enough?" The song allows us to mention all the wonderful things we have and then to gloat "but we have even more!"

ADULT For example, one verse goes, "Had God helped us forty years in the desert and not fed us manna, it would have been enough." So we sing,

HEBREW VERSE: I-lu hot-zi, hot-zi an-nu Hot-zi a-nu, mi-mitz-ray- im Hot-zi a-nu, mi-mitz-ray-im

Di E-nu

CHORUS: Di, Di E-nu
Di, Di E-nu
Di, Di E-nu
Di E-nu, Di E-nu

ENGLISH VERSE: If God brought us out of Egypt,
Brought us out of Pharaoh’s bondage,
That alone would have sufficed us

Di-E-nu

CHORUS: Di, Di E-nu

HEBREW VERSE: I-lu natan, nattan I-lu nattan I-lu, et ha-Torah, nattan I-lu, et ha-Torah,

Di E-nu

CHORUS: Di, Di E-nu

ENGLISH VERSE: If God gave us all the Torah,
Gave us the Five Books of Moses,
That alone would have sufficed us

Di-E-nu

CHORUS: Di, Di E-nu

HEBREW VERSE: I-lu natan, nattan I-lu nattan I-lu, et ha- Shabbat, nattan I-lu, et ha-Shabbat,

Di E-nu

CHORUS: Di, Di E-nu

ENGLISH VERSE: If God gave us all the Sabbath,
To rest up from six day’s labor,
That alone would have sufficed us

Di-E-nu

CHORUS: Di, Di E-nu

ENGLISH

VERSE: If God brought us into Israel
To a land of milk and honey,
That alone would have sufficed us

Di-E-nu

CHORUS: Di, Di E-nu

Nirtzah: Acceptance

ADULT: The commemoration service of the Passover is now accomplished according to its order.

ADULT: May this service be acceptable before those who cherish freedom. Shalom.

# # #

Pesach

April 4, 1996

Nisan 14, 5756


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